Months after moving to a new state, Amanda’s life changed in a surprising way. She thought they moved for her husband’s new job, but she found out he had been keeping a big secret from her. Feeling very upset and unsure about what to do next, Amanda told her story.

Two months ago, my husband dropped a bombshell. “Honey, I’ve been promoted, and we have to move two states away. We need to start packing now,” he said. I was completely shocked. I knew he traveled a lot for work, but I never thought we’d have to move, especially so quickly.

Even though it was sudden, I felt happy for him. His new job seemed to excite him. As a stay-at-home mom, the move wasn’t too hard for us. We just needed to enroll our two kids in new schools, which we could handle.

Gradually, we settled into our new life. The kids began to enjoy their new school, and the neighborhood was lovely. Our new home was bigger, and I even started going to yoga classes where I made some new friends.

Everything was going smoothly until one day when my world fell apart. While picking up my 6-year-old from school, he got into the car and started crying. I asked, “Ryan, sweetheart, what’s wrong?”

With a trembling voice, he replied, “Mommy, please don’t let Miss Foster be my mommy. I don’t want her to be my mom instead of you.”

I knew Miss Foster; she was his art teacher, a young woman in her 20s who was pregnant. I was puzzled about why Ryan was so upset. Then, he told me that he saw his dad talking to Miss Foster that morning when he was dropped off at school. Ryan saw his dad hugging her and holding her hand.

When we got home, I confronted my husband. After hours of denial, he finally broke down and admitted the truth. He confessed that he had been seeing Miss Foster for years during his work trips here. A few months ago, she told him she was pregnant with his child. Unable to find a better solution, he decided we should move so he could be close to his unborn son.

He shamefully admitted that he intended to live a double life, unsure of what else to do. I couldn’t understand why he did this, especially since we were always a happy couple, and I gave him everything he wanted. He begged for my forgiveness, but I found it impossible to forgive him.

We want to offer Amanda some advice, hoping it might help her navigate this difficult situation.

Focus on your kids first and foremost.
Focus on your children’s well-being during this tough time. Shield them from any stress or conflict between you and your husband.

Consider involving a child psychologist or therapist to support them emotionally and provide stability during these changes.

Keep communication open with Miss Foster, especially if she is involved in your child’s life as their teacher. Focus on what’s best for your child and handle the situation with maturity and understanding.

Talk to her and find out if she knew your husband was married. She is now in a difficult situation as a young pregnant woman. Offer her support and compassion, remembering that your husband is mainly responsible for this situation, not Miss Foster.

Consider seeking counseling or therapy for yourself to deal with the emotional challenges caused by your husband’s betrayal and the upheaval in your life.

Talking to a therapist can give you emotional support, coping strategies, and a safe space to process your feelings. Therapy can help you work through feelings of betrayal, anger, sadness, and confusion, and find healthy ways to move forward.